Magical Mountain
Finally, I found the cure for Toby’s disease. No one knows this disease because Toby’s case was the first. I found that there’s a magical marshmallow at the top of Mt. Cupcake which can cure any kind of disease. Immediately, I traveled to Mt. Cupcake. I had a hard time climbing the thick, red paper but it was worth it. Cutting down the tree alone will take me decades so I asked a stranger for help. When we got the marshmallow, we were so hungry, so we ended up eating the mountain and returned home. Suddenly, I woke up.
Great story. I think you could probably make the sentences flow smoother by having more sentence variety.
ReplyDeleteI think you can add a little more detail to the ending a little more. everthing else was good
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